


The Strange Boy Who Has A Morbid Fascination with Dead Organisms

by Ghost_Assist (orphan_account)



Category: Homestuck
Genre: A Whole Conversation About Animal Death, Animal Death, Corpses, Dave being Dave, Death, M/M, Morbid
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-10
Updated: 2015-03-10
Packaged: 2018-03-17 06:13:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,453
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3518429
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/Ghost_Assist
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>John meets a new friend in his Biology Honors class.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Strange Boy Who Has A Morbid Fascination with Dead Organisms

**Author's Note:**

> I hope I included all of the appropriate warnings.

John stares blankly at the variety of scientific posters that adorned the walls of Ms. Megido’s classroom. Of course, he has read them about 100 times; he probably stared at them for hours. In actuality, John’s been staring at them for roughly 5 minutes. This is the first class of the school year, and for some reason the teacher is late. John wants to groan. At first, he was looking forward to this class. However Rose and Jade weren’t with him in biology honors. Silly Rose decided that Journalism was more important than science, and Jade was in the more advanced science class. 

John considers putting his head down and taking a short nap. It’s been about ten minutes since class started, and everyone was just waiting here. The black desks look comfortable enough. It beacons him to just rest his head for just a while. It’s very tempting.

 Suddenly, the door slams open and John hears a soft “whoops,” from the entrance. All of the students pivot their heads towards the commotion, and observe the chubby 20-something looking woman holding a box full of materials. This woman is obviously Ms. Megido. The teacher asks,”Dave, did I break any of the glasses?” Behind her is a student who is also carrying a box full of materials. There’s a awkward silence that follows the teacher’s arrival, but then, in unison the whole class greets her.

The teacher smiles brightly and waves one of her hands, thus causing one of the boxes to slip through her arms. Pieces of paper slips out, and because John was fairly close to the entrance, he kneels down to assist in cleaning the mess. “Oh thank you!” Ms. Megido calls to John as she walked to her desk. She points to him, “You’re getting extra credit, kid.” John merely shrugs and gives a small smile. 

Ms. Megido turns to the class. “Okay, class,” she announces. “I just need to set up some of my materials, find my syllabus, and take roll call before we can get this class started!”

Ms. Megido takes a seat at the chair and begins preparing for class. “Just go ahead and get to know one another while I get ready,” she says. The other students go back and chat among themselves.

John gathers the documents and begins to stack the syllabuses together. He takes in a deep breath and for some reason, he inhales one of the most unpleasant odors he’s ever smelt. John doesn’t want to be impolite, but something (or someone) fucking reeks! It smells like someone was bathing in a pool of spoiled meat and poured cat food all over it. He tries not to gag, and tries to look for the source of the horrible smell. John realizes that the odor was emitting from the student in front of him. John looks up and sees the blank face of Ms. Megido’s student assistant.

The fellow student was kneeling on the floor with John. He was also collecting the paper and tossing them into the box beside him. “Sorry Bro. Saw this funky lady,” the student nods his head towards Ms.Megido “taking some cool pics of a decaying cat down the street from my house.” John didn’t respond in any way, so the other student continued. “Talked to her about how the poor cat ended up in such a sad state. Surprisingly, it didn't have rigor mortis and there was no signs indicating that the cat died recently. Also, I realized that the cat wasn’t there yesterday, so funky lady and I were like, ‘how did this golly-dang-dong corpse got here? It's been placed there for some reason, so strange dead cat lady and I were digging deep into the mysteries of the unexplained, hunting for the truth; making up theories about how the cat actually died.”

John hopes the guy doesn’t notice the sour expression on his face. It’s obvious that Mr. Roadkill here was closer to the corpse than he says. It’s evident because the smell of death clings to this guy’s skin like a cologne. But, John cant’ stop himself from biting his lower lip to distract himself from the overwhelming sensation in his olfactory gland.

John loves biology and all, but death was one of the worst aspects about the subject. It was super duper gross, and he was always uncomfortable with the sincere emotions other people displayed when it comes to the topic of death. But here was this weird kid, just casually mentioning dead cats and what-not to complete strangers.

"Wow, you okay there?" The other student asks. (Does he not notice his own stench?) 

John nods and gives the guy a thumbs up, accidentally letting loose the sheets of paper he tucked underneath his arm. John groans. He has to collect all of them again. The shaded student takes advantage of the prolonged exchange and continues his story. “So anyway, the whole cat ordeal was crazy sick. Tons of debate and questions, but no straightforward answer. We were absolutely befuddled by the crazy turn of events. This cat couldn’t be magic bro. I mean, cats don’t have the powers to transport anywhere they damn please. So the lady and I went asking around the apartment complex.”

John wants to say something. He’s not so sure why he’s being told this story, (but truth be told, it wasn’t too boring.) The other student didn’t stop rambling at all. “In the end, we were convinced that a certain Dr. Scratch wasn’t the best doc around. Doc went completely full Lifetime Antagonist on poor Princess the Cat, that evening. Dude was pretty fucked-up. Killed his neighbor’s cat just for kicks and just threw it by the roadside so he can fake Princess's inevitable death. Anyway tldr; D-Scratch kills cat, hides the evidence by planting the body on a freeway. He’s probably on his way to jail right about now."

"With the mystery solved, and the kitty-funeral invitations received, weird lady and I were about to dramatically part ways like a group of zombie hunters after the apocalypse. But, we sort of found out that I was her student, and whimsical dead-cat lady was my teacher. So I hitched a ride with her." Ending the story, the student hands John the rest of the sheets and stands up. "And that’s the story about why I smell like someone who was bathing in a pool of spoiled meat," he says with a slight frown. "And the reason why I smell like cat food is because the little girl who was the owner of the deceased kitty spilled cat food all over herself and she gave me a hug.

John looks at him with wide eyes, and quickly stands up too. “I- I didn’t mean to say that out loud,” John says embarrassed. The other student merely shrugs, takes the boxes, puts it on Ms. Megido’s desk. John follows suit, and stops him before he takes a seat. 

" Really, I just have asthma and I can’t handle strong smells sometimes," John says quickly. He points to the empty seat besides his backpack. "There’s a perfectly good seat right next to me, if you want it," John offers.

"A-are you actually asking me to sit next to you after I told you that whole story about a dead cat?" John’s classmate asks with a slight smile.

"Well, I liked the story," John replies thoughtfully. "I don’t mind if you told me another one." John then adds quickly, "I mean, we’re in biology, dude. I guess I have to get over my fears over dead things if I want to survive the zombie apocalypse," John jokes. "And if I hold my breath for just a bit, I’m pretty sure you smell like daisies," he teases.

"Yeah, sorry about all that morbid shit," the other student says. "It’s always the first thing that pops up in my mind when I try talking to people," the blond says apologetically. "I’m Dave, by the way."

"Hey Dave, I’m John." John reaches out, and tries for a fist bump, but Dave’s hand retreats to his side.

"Oh, you don’t want dead animal germs on your uniform," he says while brushing his hand on the side of his pants.

John simply laughs in response. “Dave, that’s gross! You didn’t mention you touched it!” John says with a faux expression of disgust.

"You actually seem like you don’t mind," Dave replies curiously. There’s a small silence between them, albeit it’s not entirely uncomfortable. Quietly, Dave asks,"You wanna see a picture of cat guts?"

John nods. He wonders if the breath he’s holding was due to Dave’s disgusting stench, or something more. “Yeah, I’d love that.”


End file.
